Blondesen

Wie versprochen...

There is a key-word for cooking this particular bird and that word is : «  pragmatism ».

The lawyer is a long-nibbed and sharp-clawed bird also known under the latin name Advocatus verbophilius dollarvorusque. It lives and grows in the shade of other birds' problems and actually gets bigger and more fat with every new problem.

It is not a territorial-minded bird and therefore there are usually no agressive signs when a lawyer meets another lawyer. They will merely decide how to feed best on the very same problem.

Let us assume, for instance, that a person we shall call A has a problem with a person we shall name B and that two lawyers are feeding on this problem. For an easier comprehension, we shall give the lawyers the same name as the ones we use for the persons, i.e. « lawyer A » and « lawyer B ».

In a court-room (this is a place ruled by another kind of vulture-looking birds called « Judges » who have to be addressed with the polite formula « Your Honor » and where lawyers usually feed), lawyer A will for instance say :

-         Your Honor, with all due respect to the Court and to my most distinguished colleague Lawyer B, his client is a crook.

At which lawyer B will respond in the same exquisite manner :

-         Your Honor, I totally disagree with the assertions of my most estimable colleague Lawyer A and I shall prove to the Court that the crook is indeed his own client.

From that point, the two lawyers wil be able to deliver a lot of food-producing gibberish that will feed not only the lawyers themselves, but also the Court and any other birds involved, with the noticeable exceptions of the persons AB. and

Because, in the end, they are the ones who are going to pay all the bills.

Therefore, my first recommandation to you, my dear friends encaged in Tripoli : don't be a person A neither a person B.

Just be the innocent yourselves taken as hostages and by accident in a mad story involving a dictator A and a government B.

I might of course be completely wrong, but I definitely do believe that orders have been issued at highest government levels in order to keep an unnecessary secret around the whole matter.

Until now, you two guys have only been known (or unknown ! ) as « two Swiss hostages in Tripoli ». Perhaps it would be a very good idea to come out in the light of medias. What are your names ? How old are you ? Where do you come from ? How do you kill time in the embassy ?

And... what is much more than just the abstract concept « hostages », how do you look ? People would undestand your fate and your existence as human beings a lot better with some pictures of you.

In this sense, Lawyer A and Lawyer B are not your enemies, on the contrary.

Because lawyers are very fond of publicity if it can help them win a case.

It is now a known fact that Me Charles Poncet is Lawyer A, in charge of dictator A's problem.

Do not consider him as a bad guy, but more like an objective although unwilling ally.

In the end, it will also be thanks to his hunger for more food that the door of your cage will open and that you will be able to fly back home.

This is what I call « pragmatism ».

(to be continued...)  

Mes amis ayant observé que je suis quelque peu gâteux devant les petites bêtes qui partagent mon quotidien (ainsi que Monsieur Mabut en a d'ailleurs lui aussi fait la remarquable observation, plus je connais les hommes, plus j'aime mes chattes et ma chienne, mais aussi - cela dit sans faire d'amalgames douteux - les femmes en général et les femmes de mauvaise vie en particulier, avec la notable exception des femmes à la bouche en cul-de-poule qui se prennent soit pour des hommes, soit trop au sérieux et qui par conséquent ne sont de toutes façons pas à prendre même avec des pincettes), l'un d'eux m'a fait parvenir cet éloquent extrait de vidéosurveillance.

Oui Madame, oui Monsieur et c'est bien là tout le problème.

Dans les années '80, quand les Soviétiques cherchaient à créer des colonies de vacances en Afghanistan, les Américains - jaloux, va ! - craignant pour la rude concurrence que cela représenterait sans doute et par exemple pour le Chili, n'hésitèrent pas une seconde à fournir armes, munitions et matériel aux bons patriotes afghans qui luttaient héroïquement contre l'envahisseur.

Ces bons patriotes s'appelaient les talibans.

                                                                                 Dessin de Reiser paru en 1980

Vingt après, comme dirait Marguerite Dumas ou je ne sais plus quel auteur ou autrice, les Américains et leurs alliés ont quelques menus problèmes avec ces mêmes talibans.

Moi je vous le dis, ces types ne sont pas accueillants : ils ne veulent pas d'étrangers chez eux.

Ingrats...